To understand who the servant is who is a man of pains and accustomed to illness (not great sorrow and grief) ask yourself:
This claim is based on mistranslation.
The list maker is basing his / her false claim on a mistranslation of Y'shayahu / Isaiah 53:3. The gentile nations are not saying the servant was in "great sorrow and grief" Isaiah repeats that the non-Jewish nations perceived the servant as rejected, in constant pain and accustomed to being sick constantly -- none of this "fits" Jesus of the Christian bible who is robustly healthy, traveling the countryside, right up until his death.
Although many Christian translations have "sorrow" and "grief" the words are "constant pain" and "sickness". This is another example where translators correctly translate a Hebrew word everywhere except the proof text. Strong's Concordance notes that most Christian translations correctly translate the Hebrew word מַכְא֖וֹב as "pain" in Psalm 69:26, Ecclesiastes 1:18 and Lamentations 1:12. Strong's Concordance shows that most Christian translations properly translate חֹ֑לִי as sickness in Deuteronomy 7:15, Deuteronomy 28:61, Jeremiah 6:7 and Jeremiah 10:19. "Grief" would be תּוּגָה.
Why is it that the Christian translations usually translate Hebrew accurately most of the time -- but NOT in "proof" texts purporting to be about Jesus? Honest Christians need to ask themselves "why?"
Again, to understand who the servant is and is not one must begin with the last three lines of Y'shayahu / Isaiah 52: "Behold, My servant will succeed; he will be exalted and become high and exceedingly lofty. 14 Just as multitudes were astonished over you (saying) "His appearance is too marred to be a man's, and his visage to be human, 15 so will the many nations exclaim about him, and kings will shut their mouths (in amazement) for they will see that which had never been told to them, and will perceive things they had never heard. " Y'shayahu / Isaiah 52:13 - 15. (The quote is from the Artscroll Stone Edition translation, the link is to the Judaica Press translation).
The servant was considered by the non-Jewish nations to be disgusting, subhuman and not worthy of any consideration. This was never true for Jesus.
Y'shayahu / Isaiah 53:3 is echoing those lines from Y'shayahu / Isaiah 52:13 - 14 -- the non-Jewish nations reiterate that the servant "was despised and isolated from men, a man of pains and accustomed to illness. As one from whom we would hide our faces; he was despised and we had no regard for him"
Missionaries are already descending with messages of "why Israel can not be the servant" in Y'shayahu / Isaiah 53:3. That is the "wrong question." By focusing on whether or not they think Israel "fits" the servant they are ignoring the question of whether or not Jesus fits the servant.
For the purposes of this exercise the question is: does it fit Jesus when one reads Y'shayahu / Isaiah 53:3 in context and without mistranslations?
So far the answer is "no." Jesus simply does not fit Isaiah's servant. The gentile nations of the earth did not despise or reject Jesus -- they never even heard of him in his lifetime!
The nations were "told" about Jesus and came to Christianity based on what they were told. Yet Isaiah says the opposite is true for the servant: the nations were not told, they "saw" for themselves that the despised servant is in fact loved by G-d.
While there are many interpretations of the servant's identity among Jewish sages in stories and homily (not literal meaning), most see the servant as the Jewish people. Contrary to missionary assertions this does not mean every Jew ever born, but refers instead to the Jewish nation as a whole who remains faithful to G-d. G-d Himself tells us in Torah that this is a small number of Jews, not all Jews. Read D'varim / Deuteronomy 30. Moses tells the people that there will come a time when the Jewish people will exiled from the land, and only a remnant (a small number) will remain faithful to G-d. Even Y'shayahu / Isaiah (chapter 10:20) states "the remnant of Israel and the survivors of the house of Jacob."
The servant in Isaiah 53 is the righteous remnant of Jews who, throughout history, have remained faithful to G-d and His covenant with us. This is not some "excuse." Time and again the T'nach (bible) tells us that the Jews will be exiled as a punishment and that over time only a few, a "righteous remnant" will remain. It is this righteous few who are the suffering servant of Isaiah.
Here is the Artscroll Stone Edition translation along with their footnotes at the bottom of each response to aid in your understanding of the passage.
Isaiah 52:13 Behold, My servant will succeed; he will be exalted and become high and exceedingly lofty.
14 Just as multitudes were astonished over you (saying) "His appearance is too marred to be a man's, and his visage to be human,
15 so will the many nations exclaim about him, and kings will shut their mouths (in amazement) for they will see that which had never been told to them, and will perceive things they had never heard.
53:1 Who would believe what we have heard! For whom has the arm of HaShem been revealed?
2 Formerly he grew like a sapling or like the root from arid ground; he had neither form nor grandeur; we saw him, but without such visage that we could desire him.
3 He was despised and isolated from men, a man of pains and accustomed to illness. As one from whom we would hide our faces; he was despise and we had no regard for him.
4 But in truth it was our ills that he bore, and our pains that he carried -- but we had regarded him diseased, stricken by G-d and afflicted!
5 He was pained because of our rebellious sins and oppressed through our iniquities; the chastisement upon him was for our benefit, and through his wounds we were healed.
6 We have all strayed like sheep each of us turning his own way and HaShem inflicted upon him the iniquity of us all.
7 He was persecuted and afflicted but did not open his mouth; like a sheep being led to the slaughter or a ewe that is silent before her shearers, he did not open his mouth.
8 Now that he has been released from captivity and judgment who could have imagined such a generation? For he had been removed from the land of the living, an affliction upon them that was my people's sin.
9 He submitted himself to his grave like wicked men; and the wealthy (submitted) to his executions for committing no crime and with no deceit in his mouth.
10 HaShem desired to oppress him and He afflicted him; if his soul would acknowledge guilt he would see offspring and live long days and the desire or HaShem would succeed in his hand.
11. He would see (the purpose) and be satisfied with his soul's distress. With his knowledge My servant will vindicate the Righteous One to multitudes; it is their iniquities that he will carry.
12. Therefore, I will assign him a portion from the multitudes and he will divide the mighty as spoils -- in return for having poured out his soul for death and being counted among the wicked, for he bore the sin of the multitudes, and prayed for the wicked.
Isaiah 52:13 i.e. G-d's servant the people of Israel (Rashi)
52:15 Just as Israel had once been astonishingly degraded, so it will astonish the nations by its exaltedness when the time of redemption arrives.
53:1-3 this is the prophecy foretelling what the nations and their kings will exclaim when they witness Israel's rejuvenation. The nations will contrast their former scornful attitude toward the Jews (vv. 1-3) with their new realization of Israel's grandeur (vv 4-7).
53:5 we brought suffering upon Israel for our own selfish purposes; it was not, as we had claimed, that G-d was punishing Israel for its own evil behavior.
53:6 We sinned by inflicting punishment upon Israel. Such oppression is often described as "Hashem's punishment" (see 10:5, Habakkuk 1:12), for He decreed that it should happen (Abarbanel).
53:8 When Israel's exile is finally ended the nations will marvel that such a generation could have survived the expulsion from "the land of the living, i.e. Israel, that the nations had sinfully inflicted upon it.
53:9 Ordinary Jews chose to die like common criminals, rather than renounce their faith; and wealthy Jews were killed for no reason other than to enable their wicked conquerors to confiscate their riches (Radak).
53:10 That is, Israel. G-d replies to the nations that Israel's suffering was a punishment for its own sins; and when the people realize this and repent, they will be redeemed and rewarded.
53:11 Israel will teach the nations of G-d's righteousness.